Trees and a Proposalvery

The trees in our backyard needed more than just trimming. We had some friends and neighbors come to our rescue with the smaller trees that needed to come down, but I had been saving my cello money for a while so we could hire the big guns.

Voegele Tree Service showed up early and stayed all day. They took down two big trees and trimmed so very many branches to keep our backyard safe and to help us steward our yard well. The garden will have more sunshine this summer!

After they left, I took a look at a slab from one of the big trees, and I was extra grateful that we finally had the tree taken down. I LOVE big old trees, the shade they provide, the home for animals the trees create, and the many fun things kids can do (like climb and make a reading nook in the branches). But I also want to provide a safe haven for my people.

The trees gave us another gift, plenty of firewood for the firepit on the back patio. We enjoyed some of the half heifer we bought from Richardson Farms. The t-bone steaks made a perfect meal to celebrate our proposal-versary around the fire.

 

Marriage Monday

True love is opening my pajama drawer to find neatly folded and stacked pajamas awaiting me. My husband knows me well.

 

Marriage Monday - Days 21 & 22

So we obviously didn't hit our "Forty Dates for Forty Years" goal this year. But we DID have a lot of fun trying new adventures together. 

In November, we snuck away to explore some trails at Queen Wilhelmina State Park. We had never been to this part of Arkansas before, and its beauty astounded me.

The slow mornings at the Air BnB were exactly what we needed to promote conversations and sharing our hearts.

The autumn colors and cooler temperatures rejeuvenated our souls.

We've recently discovered "The Art of Spousing" podcast, and we're enjoying perusing the resources they offer for our marriage toolbox.

Hiking along the Ouachita Trail for the first time, we decided that we need to come back more often.

The Friends of the Ouachita Trail do a phenomenal job of maintaining the trail in addition to offering shelters and information for hikers. 10/10 would recommend!

 

Middle-Aged Romance

"In both marriage and life with God, it's the constraint of commitment that will create space for love to mature and real transformation to occur. We often chafe against it, but in the end, like a caterpillars in the constraints of pupae, it is where are transformed into butterflies -- entirely new creatures of beauty." 

~John Mark Comer, "Practicing the Way"

The day after we helped our favorite farmer, breakfast frittata was the obvious choice because our dining room table was absolutely covered in bell peppers. My kind husband served me breakfast on the porch, and we enjoyed a slow start to the day.

Romance looks a little bit different than it used to. On this day, it looked like using a coffee coupon for "BOGO" as we hit the road to drive to a Drewry Farms for our last opportunity to grab several varieties of apples. We came home with Arkansas Black, Fuji, and Pink Lady to dehydrate, cook into apple butter, and eat plain.

When we returned, the afternoon was cool and rainy, perfect for beginning to chop and freeze all those beautiful peppers. Even though we gave away many of them, we still had a table full! So we utilized our library's free video website, and watched one of the BBC originals of Miss Marple, starring Joan Hickson. The Saturday was well spent, reconnecting, accomplishing much, and very much kindling the middle-aged romance.

Day 18 of 40

We earned another stamp on our Coffee Crawl card the weekend after Aaron returned. 

As we drove through and picked up our drinks, the lady at the window said, "Two hot?" but what we heard was "Too hot!" We looked at each other and laughed because we were thinking the same thing :) I'm thankful to be married to a guy who delights me more and more every day. Middle-aged marriage is a beautiful thing.

We drove to Drewry Farms to pick up bushels of sweet potatoes, apples, and winter squash. I had checked the weather before we left, but we were surprised by rain while we were at the farm. The plan was to take a nice long hike together, but the much needed rain changed our plans.

We chose to take the Middle Fork Road trail at the Bayou Bluff Recreation Area, part of the Ozark-St. Francis National Forest. Aaron had camped at this little gem of a park in the past.

This dirt road gave us an easier trail to follow in the rain as we followed the bayou and listened to the peaceful sound of the raindrops. Our small umbrella helped protect us as we snuggled underneath and thought of one of our favorite songs, Bus Stop.

Marriage Monday - Days 16 and 17 of 40

I Take Master Card (Charge Your Love to Me)

by Nikki Giovanni

I've heard all the stories

'bout how you don't deserve me

'cause I'm so strong and beautiful and wonderful and you could

never live up to what you know I should have but I just want to let you know:

I take Master Card

You can love me as much as your heart can stand

then put the rest on

account and pay the interest 

each month until we get this settled

You see we modern women do comprehend

that we deserve a whole lot more

than what is normally being offered but we are trying

to get aligned with the modern world

So baby you can love me all

you like 'cause you're pre-approved 

and you don't have to sign on 

the bottom line

Our hometown recently began a "coffee crawl" with cards to get stamped at each of the local coffee shops. This is the perfect way to give us some dating direction before Aaron goes back to the Solomon Islands next week. We are having so much fun on these little mini dates!

Wedding in Wichita

On wedding day for Lenna, we found a beautiful trail that wound around neighborhoods and a lake with beautiful birds. What a great way to work out the kinks from the road trip!

Especially since I had some great company to walk with me.

Cellotrio made beautiful wedding music in the very live room, everything resonated beautifully. And the reverb was incredible!

We're super excited for these two and praying for the impact they will make in their community as they both begin grad school.

 

Day 15 of 40

We knew we would be on the road more today as we meandered our way home, so we intentionally stopped at the Fred Berry Conservation Education Center to hike a trail. The center is closed on the weekends, but the trails are open.

We hiked along most of the Creek Bluff Trail, it was underwhelming and very hot with little shade, but we enjoyed the opportunity to stretch our legs.

Our next stop was Bull Shoals Caverns, a more intimate experience than other caverns we have visited.

No huge rooms, just small spaces where we could have touched the walls on both sides. But we didn't, because living caves don't like human touch :)

On the way home, we took another stretch break. This time we stopped in the little town of Leslie, which is making a huge effort to revitalize its cute downtown.

We found some beautiful hand carved nativity sets and a gorgeous Noah's Ark, hand carved by Charlie's Dream. I may have to add these to my grandparent stash for the future!

We always take food with us so we don't have to spend money to eat out on trips like this. But the last place we visited was the new ice cream shop downtown: Buffalo River's Lickety Split. Definitely get the ice cream nachos. The "chips" are broken pieces of waffle cones, what a great idea to steward your resources well! The scoops are huge enough that we share the nachos and both ate plenty. What a treat!

Days 13 and 14 of 40

We are way behind on our 40 days of dates for 40 years of friendship, but that's okay. Our friendship and our marriage are still going strong! For our anniversary, we decided to go back to one of our favorite cabins in the middle of nowhere: Beit Shalom.

On the way to the cabin Friday afternoon, we stopped at one of my favorite roadside stands and bought several watermelons. They often have cantaloupe and corn and tomatoes and allllll of the local delicious summer produce. I read "The Sabbath Way" out loud and we discussed as Aaron chauffeured. 

Saturday morning began with anniversary sourdough discard blueberry muffins gifted by my favorite farmer. I watched the mist slowly move down the valley. A slow, peaceful start to the day was exactly what we needed.

Due to some family generosity, we made a last minute decision to float the middle Buffalo River. We had never floated this section before.

The river was full of people and music, and I enjoyed my husband using his incredible skills he has honed from paddling a dugout canoe around the Pacific Ocean. I hardly had to pick up a paddle!

I just soaked up the view and the love flowing behind me as Aaron deftly steered and navigated the busy river. 

"Delight is both a trailhead for and a signpost along the Sabbath way. If a Sabbath practice is whittled down to its irreducible core, what remains is largely a commitment to making room in one's life to recover a sense of delight." ~Travis West

We pulled into this shallow cave for lunch and chatted while we pulled out veggies and hummus to go along with our cold brats from Shaky K Farm. I lost all sense of time and didn't even check my watch. One of the concepts in "The Sabbath Way" is that time slows down or even ceases to exist when we are truly resting. I haven't experienced that in a very long time. My brain naturally runs to the next thing on my to-do list. This day was full of delight and joy and connection, truly a much needed day of rest and play.

Days 11 and 12 of 40

We're not making much headway on our 40 days of friendship goals, but we are definitely having fun together and we are thankful for all of the opportunities to love our community with our time and energy.

Day 11 was a movie, which is a rarity for us, Aaron saw that "Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade" was being shown again in theaters, so he asked me out on a date :) Day 12 was our impromptu breakfast date on Father's Day.

 

Marriage Monday

"People need to know we have weaknesses. Nobody wins when we pretend we have it all together. Heart-focused communities are characterized by transparency. The strong members of the group use their strength to help the weak, not ignore them. If people learn that sharing their weakness will get them in trouble, they learn to wear masks and hide what they fear is unacceptable to others. This is a big problem because people who conceal their weaknesses can't grow." 

~Marcus Warner, "A Deeper Walk"

At 6:45 a.m. on Father's Day, I got a wild and crazy idea. I love my routines and schedules, spontaneous outings are not really my things. But I had a coupon for a local restaurant we hadn't tried, and I thought walking to breakfast sounded like a great way to celebrate this guy.

We quickly donned our walking shoes and walked the 1 1/4 miles downtown. Our waiter was fabulous and helped us pick food that delighted our taste buds. We even had plenty of time to walk back home and get ready for church.

 

On the way home, Aaron brought up a recent conversation that hadn't gone so well. He gently and thoughtfully pointed out some areas for growth in my life. And he was exactly right. 

The above quote was written about communities, but I think it applies to marriages, too. Transparency and safety with each other provide a foundation for growth. We can share our weaknesses with each other instead of trying to hide them. Mine have a way of popping to the surface unannounced. I just discovered "The Art of Spousing" on social media and Apple Podcasts, and I'm looking forward to exploring their topics and resources more. Another tool to go into our marriage toolbox! 

Day 10 of 40

Our last day together, we decided to splurge and walk over to Common Grounds Coffee House for brunch. Their mission statement: To build a culture and atmosphere of inclusion by employing individuals with disabilities, empowering them and helping them to achieve their full potential, while creating a memorable coffee experience for our customers and guests. The barista made my latte at exactly the right temperature, 190 degrees. As we paid for our order, a regular came in behind us. The barista knew the guy's order without having to be told. The food was scrumptious. The walk to and from the restaurant was filled with historic, one of a kind buildings. Fabulous way to begin the day together. 

The main hallway of the Air BnB displayed paintings by artists from Missouri. This one, named "Eating Up the Lights", caught my eye. The website has a detailed description of the process, but the last few sentences made me catch my breath: "A long procession of marker lights would highlight the safest path through an otherwise hazardous and unpredictable river. With confidence in his lead crew, the boat's pilot would gently advance into the darkness toward this path of lights."

 

What a beautiful analogy of how the Lord leads us through a hazardous and unpredictable life river with a path of lights so we can gently and safely advance.

On the way home, we paused to hike outside Poplar Bluff on the easy Wolf Creek Trail. Getting the blood circulating again felt good. The honeysuckle was in full bloom, perfuming the air along the rain washed trail. We did bring some Missouri ticks home with us, and now I've stocked the van with bug spray for the next time we invest in our marriage along the trails!

 

Day 9 of 40

We're history nerds, so Ste. Genevieve, Missouri, seemed like the perfect place for us to explore together. We utilized Aaron's willingness to donate plasma to stay in a beautiful old building, the Dr. Hertich House, built around 1850.

Breakfast on the patio gave us more opportunities to talk through some books that we've been reading and to enjoy a relaxed start to the day.

The Modoc Ferry took us across the Mississippi River 

and reminded us of all the boat travel we do when we are in the Solomon Islands.

The day was absolutely gorgeous. A slight breeze. Blue skies. Perfect for making memories together.

Our first stop was a big WIN.

Fort de Chartres reminded us of our visits to Castillo de San Marcos.

Climbing around on the walls took us back to our college days when we explored the walls and towers of Lucerne. As we continue to build on the foundation of our friendship and strengthen our secure attachment with each other, our marriage slowly grows into a strong, tall shelter. Playing together is one of the things that adds bricks to the legacy we are slowly creating.

Trusting that the Lord is the One actively and intentionally laying those bricks is the mortar that cements us and protects us from growing self absorbed. Even with all of our differences.

The other places we tried to visit in Illinois either weren't open or were just disappointing. Fort Kaskaskia had beautiful trees and an old graveyard that had been moved to save it from the encroaching Mississippi River. The Pierre Menard home was closed, despite the posted hours.

So we consoled ourselves with ice cream once we got back across the Mississippi River. Sara's Ice Cream makes an incredible brownie sundae!